2 Corinthians 12:19-21 19 Have you been thinking all along that we have been defending ourselves to you? It is in the sight of God that we have been speaking in Christ, and all for your upbuilding, beloved. 20 For I fear lest when I come I may find such things as I wish, and I may be found by you not as you wish, that there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder. 21 I fear lest when I come again my God may humble me before you, and I may have to mourn over many of those who sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual immorality, and sensuality that they have practiced.
Paul adds further assurance of his motive in v. 19. Perhaps he was starting to reconsider his strong rhetoric or may be imagining some resistance from the Corinthians. Whatever the case, he makes his purpose clear one more time. He and his companions (at least Titus and the brother from v. 18) are defending themselves and pushing themselves forward with a martyr complex. Paul did not boast about suffering or send Titus to Corinth to push an agenda for selfish reasons or to make themselves look good. Everything that the ministry team has done has been in Christ.
Anything done in Christ is done for his glory and honor. To be “in Christ” requires a person to acknowledge the lordship and supremacy of Christ. This is a growing experience of faith that involves increasing consecration of self and reliance upon the grace of Christ. It will become evident in love, which builds others up. This was Paul’s approach in his relationship with the Corinthians. Having this type of motivation and action is not easy when dealing with difficult people.
In v. 20, Paul expresses one of his concerns for writing this letter. The letter is one way of preparing for a visit. His intended outcome is that they will read the letter carefully, reject the false apostles, and make changes in their behavior. If they listen to the letter, the visit should go well. But if they do not, then the situation may be tense. Paul may find them involved in things they should not be, and they will find him upset and using his apostolic authority to straiten things out. He gives a vice list that gives flesh to this concern. These are things he does not want to find happening: quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder. These all are driven by selfishness and show a lack of love. This is the result of feeding the self with a false gospel of health, wealth, and prosperity. The lifestyle of the cross is love shown through humility and service to others. The way the Corinthians were acting would lead to church splits, hurt feeling, and loss of witness.
Paul’s appeal in v. 21 is more personal and emotional as he anticipates the possibility that the Corinthians will not change by the time he gets there. His fear is that God will humble him. This may be a way of saying that Paul’s heart will be broken in sorrow for what he will find. How will God humble Paul? There will be a deep sadness that comes upon Paul, possibly disappointment. He may need to say sorry for his strong rhetoric because it did not accomplish what he hoped. By making this statement, he is putting additional emotional pressure on the Corinthians so they will listen. This letter shows an extensive plea for change.
His bottom line fear is that people will not repent from their sins of impurity, sexual immorality, and sensuality. These activities are like playing with fire and can destroy a person’s faith and cause them to fall from grace. Paul is calling for a rededication and recommitment to Jesus and the new life he brings. It is never too late to turn back in repentance, but to continue going down the same path may lead to judgment and condemnation. There is no room for rebellious sins like this in God’s kingdom. The Corinthians should know this based on what Paul wrote to them before (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). One clear lesson we can learn from these verses is that sin must be taken seriously. Paul took the situation in Corinth serious enough to make himself vulnerable in this letter by bringing up his own journey of weakness.
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