Christmas can be a wonderful time of joy and celebration. There is just a happiness in the air. The malls in the Philippines are buzzing with people and the streets are packed with cars. The music is joyful. There is much anticipation of getting together with friends and families. Traditions bring back happy memories.
Yet, for some people, Christmas brings pain and sorrow because loved ones are no longer with us. It becomes challenging to carry on traditions without them. Nothing quite seems the same without those who have gone before us. There is a sense of deep loneliness that never quite seems to go away. We are in the happy moments of Christmas when all of a sudden deep grief comes back like the waves of the sea shore. We realize that life is no longer the same. We must cope with the new situation. This is a reality that many people face. How can Christmas be joyful again?
Peter reminds us that
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, 5 who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
Grief is an opportunity for our faith to grow. No one wants to face trials or suffering, but inevitably these are part of life. Grief is one of the deepest and most subtle forms of suffering humans experience. If you do not have a loss in your life, surely those around you or in your pastoral care do. We must ask God for a deep empathy and sympathy for those who walk the lonely road of sorrow. Isaiah prophesied that the coming messiah would be “despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). We are not alone on the seemingly lonely road of grief.
The night Jesus was born, the angels appeared to shepherds proclaiming, “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men” (Luke 2:14, KJV). God’s answer for sorrow is peace. On the night Jesus met with his disciples for one last meal together and just before he was betrayed and arrested, his disciples may have begun to have a sense of loss. Grief was starting but they did not understand how or why. This would come later. Jesus’ answer to them was, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (John 14:27).
The answer to our grief and loneliness at Christmas or any holiday is found in the peace of God in Christ. Paul wrote the Philippians, “And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7). The word “guard” is interesting here. It is word of assurance. It is a word that strengthens our faith when the trials and tribulations come or when the loneliness tries to creep in. Jesus also told his disciples, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).
How can the peace of God be a healing balm for grief? Paul wrote in Romans 15:13, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” The joy and peace that are central to Christmas are available to us if we trust in God. “Trust” is another word for faith. We have to take a bold step of faith and seek God’s presence through the Holy Spirit. Hope is the realization that we do not walk the lonely road of sorrow by ourselves. We have the Comforter who grows within us the spark of hope until it is a fire burning brightly and illuminating the path we may have no choice in walking.
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