Ephesians 5:21-33
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Introduction
There is a a crisis in marriage today, with over 50% of marriages ending.
People want to redefine marriage between people of same gender.
There is confusion about how people should act in marriage.
In the old days, people had models in their own parents to follow. Today, there are few examples of strong Christian marriages, especially in the popular media.
Technical Matters of Translation:
There is a lot of confusion and abuse of this passage. Many modern Bibles begin a new section with 5:21. This is unfortunate. The literal reading of the passage in the Greek text looks something like this:
“be filled with the Spirit, speaking to yourselves in psalms and humans and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your hearts to the Lord, giving thanks always for all things in the name to the God and father of the our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another in fear of Christ, wives to your own husbands as to the Lord, because a man is the head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church, he is the savior of the body.”
The key verb that governs the whole passage is “be filled with the Spirit.” There are four dependent participles, which are probably instrument (we add the word “by”). They show how we can be filled with the Spirit. These are not prerequisites but are evidences and what our part is:
- Speaking to one another
- Singing and making melody
- Giving thanks
- Submitting to one another
There is no verb or participle in v. 22, though just about every English translation adds one as a command. The Greek literally has: “wives to your own husbands as to the Lord”. This is a phrase dependent upon the main verb found in v. 18. The word “submit” is assumed from v. 21, which is a common thing in the Greek. The relationship of a wife to her husband is to match what all believers ought to do: submit to one another. V. 24 is similar. There is no verb in the last half of the sentence but it is supplied by the English translators. V. 24 literally reads: “But as the church submits to Christ, so also wife to the husbands in everything.”
1. Women who submit
Submission involves humility, kindness, willingness to listen, consideration, patience and many other “fruits of the Spirit.”
Wives have two models for knowing how to treat their husbands:
1) the submission that ought to be modeled within the church, the body of Christ, and
2) the submission the church ought to have to Christ.
Jesus wants the home to be a miniature model of the Church.
2. Men who love
Husbands are to love no matter what type of response they get from their wives.
Love takes many of the same features as humility. They are closely related.
Husbands ought to treat their wives as Christ has treated them, which is a common motivation in Paul’s writings.
We have a challenging model to follow: just as Christ loved the church. How much did Christ love the church? He gave himself for her (v. 26).
Why did Christ give himself for the church?
1) To make her holy (v. 26)
2) To present her as radiant (v. 27)
Principles from the example of Christ and the church:
1) The #1 goal of a husband is to help his wife be holy.
2) The way God has set this is up is for a husband to give himself totally to his wife and love her unconditionally. The husband is the wife’s number one fan.
We need to develop a wholesome, healthy, and dynamic view of marriage. It is not “me” and “her,” but “us.”
Paul gives a deep thought in vv. 29-31 and even calls it a “mystery” in v. 32. This is not easy to figure out. It takes all our best thinking, all our brains can muster, to dig deeply into the depths of the concept of marriage. Unfortunately, so many couples never get past the surface stuff.
The Concept of Unity (vv. 29-32)
Recall some principles about the church Paul has given already in this letter:
1) The church is the embodiment of God’s presence on earth.
2) The church participates in the God’s great plan for the redemption of all creation.
3) The church is the recipient of God’s grace and forgiveness.
4) The church is Christ’s body and the fullness of his presence in the Holy Spirit.
5) The church is made up of many people with diverse gifts but the many are one, with one purpose and one faith.
Application to marriage
What Christ has done for the church, husbands ought to do for their wives:
1) Unconditional care
2) Totally giving of themselves to their wives
3) Be and do all things as one entity, one flesh, one person
Bottom line to a happy marriage: being Spirit-filled, living lives of Christ-likeness, giving ourselves totally to the other person in unconditional love and sacrifice.
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